Ok, its no secret. I hate Comcast. I hate their horrible customer service and their lazy, worthless technicians that don’t give a crap about your problems. But you know who I hate every more? No, LOATHE even more? Verizon. for a number of reasons. The first and foremost reason is that back in 2013, Verizon had a large lay off of like, 5000 something employees in the NJ area. One of those being my best friends brother, who has been unable to find work that paid the same caliber since then and now works his ass to the bone to stay afloat in today’s turd like economy. This isn’t what this article is about, I just wanted to provide some context as to why I loathe Verizon so much.
(Verizon Executives are on the other side of this, at least in my mind. I’m gonna need another mag)
According to DSLReports, Verizon has turned down a six year, 144 million dollar a year contract in federal funding, to expand its broadband network, for reasons unknown, other than what can be speculated upon. What we think is that Verizon wants to abandon its copper network all together, in addition to getting out of fiber optic and just focus on wireless 100%. They no longer purchase any new or additional hardware to support its back bone and then they do their current customers dirty by selling them HORRIBLE DSL services and locking up poles and runs of line for certain areas, just to prevent someone else from providing an alternative solution for that area. (its what we like to call “Hogging the Pole”)
Verizon turns in BILLIONS in profits each month but then turns its back on its customers by providing them horrible service and even worse technical support and then on top of that, refusing federal subsidies to expand its network and improve it? WTF? What is the reasoning in that? I got news for you. If I worked for a company and I sold you a shitty product and then gave you even shittier support when it wasn’t working and then told you we aren’t going to make any improvements to the product to remedy its failure, you can bet your ass you would be marching to my competitor. Guess what, you can’t do that here in the United States because we have whats called REGIONAL MONOPOLIES, where you are stuck with one, horrible, dog shit service in a single area because they want to lock the poles up. Someone run me over with a bus because at this point, that would be a vacation than having to deal with Verizon. Make sure it kills me too.
Do you see this man in the GIF above? This is what I want to do to myself when I have to deal with Verizon. No matter what circumstance it is. I either get Sim Sim Ala Bim that I can’t understand on the phone or I get a tech that comes out, looks at the hardware and says “Yep, that’s a phone cable.” I mean honestly, you would be better off just taking a bag full of wrenches and sockets and THROWING THEM AT THE MODEM and seeing if that fixes what ever issue you are having and then if that doesn’t solve your problem, you should just dunk the modem in a bucket of ice cream and then put it in a blender.
Oh look, its what is actually happening to my money when I have to use Verizon.
By the way, I don’t have Verizon. I have Comcast, those fuckers can also get cancer. All of them. Especially what genius thought it was OK to not give my modem a new dynamic IP every now and again. Fuck you guy, fuck you. Next time you see a Comcast or Verizon vehicle, go over and piss on it and when the guy driving asks you what your doing, just reply “I’m returning the favor.”.
